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When I was pregnant with my first child in 2020, I’ll never forget how overwhelmed I felt scrolling the various lists of pregnancy and postpartum must-haves shared by well-intentioned friends. I plucked the links of every potential bouncer, binky, and boppy from various spreadsheets and articles and passed them to my husband who, being the project manager that he is, put them into our own spreadsheet.
“Do I really need the bouncer?” I asked my best friend. “The whole stroller system? What’s a wipe warmer?” While it was beneficial to know what my friends used and didn’t, I’ve since learned a lot about what’s essential, aesthetically pleasing (especially in a small space), and built to go the distance.
I’m now five years into motherhood with two kids under my belt. As a parent, I’ve lived in a major metropolitan city as well as a mid-size one, traveled extensively with the kids, and I wish I could go back and tell past me what to do differently. Where to save money and where to splurge. Which products I’d want to be organic or “clean,” which stroller I’d actually use. And while I can’t go back in time, I can help you.
What to buy during these stages of parenthood can be extremely personal and may require some self-reflection. While parenthood is a lot of learning to know your baby, it also helps to know yourself. For example, we did not want a baby monitor that would beep every time the temperature in the air dropped below 68 degrees. But you may! And that’s cool, too. Remember: You can get all the advice in the world, but if it doesn’t make you feel confident and empowered as a parent, then it’s not the right fit.
So with that in mind, if you’re open to one more opinion about what you may or may not want from pregnancy into postpartum and beyond: These are the top things I’d have done differently, and what I’d have bought instead.
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I’D HAVE BOUGHT MORE VERSATILE PREGNANCY-TO-POSTPARTUM CLOTHES
During my first pregnancy, I refused to buy maternity clothes. Until one day I walked into my closet and Nothing. Fit. Me. So I caved and bought one pair of Hatch Boyfriend Jeans and a few maternity shirts on sale at Gap. I got a nice pair of LAKE maternity pajamas, which I still believe are the best maternity pj’s on the planet (it’s the snap placket), and I invested in a pair of buttery soft Beyond Yoga maternity leggings that I wore for, no joke, at least a year postpartum. I also began my love affair with Natalie Martin dresses, and five years later, I’m still collecting them as often as my wallet will allow.
These were all excellent choices, but there were some misses, too. Cheap leggings via targeted ads, pajamas that just weren’t comfortable or efficient enough, and more. Here’s what else I would have bought to take me from pregnancy to postpartum in style.
I’d have invested in nicer pajamas, loungewear, and athleisure wear to transition from pregnancy to postpartum
Since my kids were born, I’ve discovered Kindred Bravely Lounge Sets, which are extremely comfortable, wash well (a must!), and come in silhouettes that accommodate all varieties of body shapes and sizes. For snoozing and lying around the house, I highly recommend the CozyKnit Long Cardigan and Wide Leg Lounge Pant, as well as the Aria Bamboo Cropped Tee and Lounge Pant. It should also be known that I’ve loved everything I bought from Storq, which is joining the Kindred Bravely family. (Bravo!)
When it comes to getting out, though, SPANX makes extremely soft and chic sets that are perfect for running errands, travel, or just lounging in style. I love the silhouette of their Barrel Leg Pant, though the Wide Leg Pant may be slightly more versatile in accommodating both pregnant and non-pregnant bodies. I wish I’d had pieces like these in my postpartum period, when sometimes feeling good and looking pulled together is as simple as a shower and a matching set.
I’d have bought more non-materinity leggings.
I’m glad I invested in one nice pair of maternity leggings, but if you just cannot bring yourself to buy them, you might be able to get away with Lululemon Align Leggings. I was aghast when I found out there is no maternity option at Lululemon – the nerve! – and while this still rubs me the wrong way, I was able to wear my Aligns in my first pregnancy up to 37 weeks! These may not work comfortably for all pregnant bodies, but for some, it’s a great option to avoid pricey leggings that will only work for a few months.
Want a bit more lift? SPANXshape™ Booty Boost® 7/8 Leggings are soft and lightweight, but offer significantly more support than the Aligns. As my belly grew, I wish I’d had more help in the hips and lower belly, especially on long walks or during yoga.
I’D HAVE SPLURGED AND SAVED DIFFERENTLY
Having babies is similar to having a wedding in that you don’t know exactly what to expect and you CANNOT EMOTIONALLY AFFORD FOR THIS TO GO WRONG. Which is when fear sets in and we end up throwing our money at our problems. However, I also learned the hard way that maybe I should have spent a little more money on things that mattered (or at least would be visible to everyone who entered my house).
During my first pregnancy, I bought everything at full price or put it on my registry. The second time, I did more second-hand shopping (and thank God for hand-me-downs), but even still, I could have saved so much more money.
I’d have shopped at more affordable retailers
Facebook Marketplace can be great for getting used baby gear, but it’s also risky – potentially not trustworthy, quality is not guaranteed, and in my opinion, sometimes more trouble than it's worth. If I could do it all over again, I’d shop at REBEL, the overstock retailer that offers up to 70% off everything including cribs, baby monitors, car seats, strollers, carriers, and so much more, and in brands you love like Britax, Nanit, Stokke, Tiny Land, and Baby Brezza. By working directly with their partners, they’re able to divert more than 25 million pounds of returned product from landfills just this year!
It’s hard to resist the pricey and adorable clothing that show up in my targeted ads, but with two young kids in school/day care, I learned quickly that I couldn’t send my daughter to school in her Boden cashmere cardigan. That’s why I’ve been loving Quince, where I don’t have to sacrifice style or quality for price. I’ve gotten my kids everything from organic cotton underwear to plush bamboo sleep sacks to a lunch box (yes, it fits a bento box!). Oh, and speaking of maternity clothes: Quince has cute, more affordable, and well-made essentials that work just as well in pregnancy as they do beyond, like this adorable knit set or these cozy cotton overalls.
Quince also has fantastic baby & kids home goods, including a collaboration with Maxi-Cosi and Naturepedic. (And while this is not one of my usual beauty stories, you have to check out their beauty and wellness category, too. They carry some of my favorite brands like Augustinus Bader, Allies of Skin, Le Prunier, ISDIN, and more.) I love a one-stop shop.
Splurging, on the other hand, is entirely co-dependent on your lifestyle, budget, and overall aesthetics, but if I could do it again…
I’d have gotten a meal delivery service
I did it the old-school way: Frontloading a bunch of casseroles and DoorDashing an acceptable amount of protein + trashy carbs. We were fortunate enough to have a meal train, which might have single handedly kept me alive, but now that I’m beyond the haze of the fourth trimester, I wish I’d have just splurged on a few weeks of Factor, Thistle, or Sakara. While I was nursing, I craved fats, proteins, and warm, nourishing foods like broth, sauteed kale, and congee. My sweet husband did his best to cook everything I craved, but he, too, was busy cleaning dishes, doing laundry, and rocking the baby so I could sleep.
Pre-Made Meal Kit
Factor
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“I tried everything to cure my acne and nothing worked. It wasn’t until I started treating it from the inside out that I saw real change and results. These meals fixed my gut, which then healed my skin.
Our Sakara Signature Nutrition Program is based on our proprietary nutrition philosophy, focused on cultivating a diverse gut microbiome. Eating this way cleared my skin after years of chronic cystic acne. Now I use it to maintain my overall health and metabolism. I cannot live without these meals, and they taste amazing. I eat these meals throughout the week. I don’t know what I would do without them.”
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Factor
I’d have spent more on the toys and furniture that are always visible
When my daughter was born, we lived in a two-bedroom house in Los Angeles, and then moved into an apartment in North Carolina. Even now, in a larger home and with two kids, we don’t have a dedicated play room. THIS WHOLE HOUSE IS THEIR PLAY ROOM. And that means that I’ve had to curate the kids’ gear to my aesthetic.
Everything from Lalo looks nice and holds up over time, but I especially love the Lalo play kitchen, which is playful and sophisticated at once, and looks adorable in any room. For something more whimsical, I’m nuts about this Jellybean Interiors Confetti Kids Table + Chairs, which is easy to clean (essential) and made from recycled non-toxic materials. It can also be used indoors or outdoors!
While it’s less useful in the early days, the kids will grow up (even though the fourth trimester feels like 1000 years), and when they do, I want beautiful play pieces that both adults and kids can enjoy. This Tiny Land 7-in-1 Montessori Climbing Set gives kids years of indoor play and I don’t mind leaving it out in the living room. Same goes for these Gathre Block Playset, which honestly makes our home look more like an interactive kids museum than a play place. Finally, I can’t overstate how useful Stapelstein Stacking Stones are for multi-purpose fun.
I’d have invested in more products that would grow with the kids
More Stylish Than Functional
With its minimalist wood frame and sleek Scandinavian design, the Stokke Tripp Trapp high chair looks like it was plucked straight from a glossy design catalog. But despite its chic appeal, I found it surprisingly high-maintenance. Cleaning it after every meal was a chore, the seat itself didn’t seem all that comfortable, and adjusting the height or straps took more time (and patience) than I had most nights. Oh, and did I mention it's a small fortune?
Since I already spent the money, I do plan to bring ours back into rotation as my girls get older. It can be adjusted into a sturdy chair or step stool, making it one of those rare baby purchases that actually earns a second life down the road.
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I didn’t know I could love a car seat, but here I am, head over heels for the Nuna RAVA ($550). Yes, it’s expensive for sure, but it’ll fit your kiddo up to 50 lbs and look gorgeous in the process. Most importantly, it has excellent safety reviews with its all-steel frame, reinforced belt path, and energy absorbing form for superior protection.
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I wouldn’t have bought a bouncer, which both my kids had no interest in after they started learning to crawl at four and five months, respectively. I’d have gotten the Nuna LEAF Grow, which accommodates newborns to small kids. The seat pad has a removable 3-point harness and can transition to a toddler seat (even my 5-year-old sits in it to read). It reclines up and down and sways left to right. It’s nice to look at, doesn’t make any loud noises or buzzing, and has removable GOTS™ certified organic insert fabric.
I also wouldn’t have gotten the high chair with the one-handed pull-out tray (which was unattractive, horrible for 6-month-olds just learning to sit up and eat solids, and not even versatile enough to see them through toddlerhood). I’d have gotten a Stokke Tripp Trapp or Clikk, which is what we’re using now (after I sold the old high chair). Both can be used starting at 6 months with inserts, and the Clikk easily goes up to 3 years, though the Tripp Trapp may be the most multi-use of the two.
I’d have gotten a car seat that would accommodate my gigantic son at every age. My youngest isn’t even two yet, which means he’ll be rear-facing in his car seat for a while longer and already there is absolutely nowhere for his legs to go. I wish I’d invested in the Nuna Rava, which can comfortably fit rear-facing children from 5 to 50 lbs. When forward-facing, it can accommodate growth up to 65 lbs. It’s FAA-certified for travel, has a no-thread harness for comfort, and is sleek and easy to use.
While we’re on the topic of giant children – Love To Dream Bamboo pajamas, while pricier than some, have been a lifesaver for my tall children who are consistently in the 90th percentile of height. These super-soft pj’s are not only stretchy and cute, they are long, which means they will fit for 1 year+, actually saving me money in the long run!
As for toys, one of the best choices we made was buying my daughter a Toniebox for her 1st birthday. We love our Yoto Mini, too, and travel with it always, but the Toniebox has proven the test of time. My daughter has loved it since she was 1 1/2, and now at 5, she still listens to it every night before bed. The newest version, the Toniebox 2, has fun interactive games, an alarm, a sleep timer, and more customizable settings. (Her younger brother, almost 2, is also obsessed.)
I’D HAVE GOTTEN A HEAVY-DUTY DIAPER BAG AND A DOES-IT-ALL STROLLER
Between my two kids, I bought three diaper bags before settling on this one. The first one was cheap and popular on Amazon, but it just never seemed to hold enough stuff. The second one was chic and elegant (I still use it sans baby stuff), but honestly, it was too nice for baby crap. The third one was cute and genderless so both my husband and I could enjoy it, but it was really more like a regular backpack and the lack of lining inside was an issue. I should have just gotten the Caraa Baby Tote.
My Caraa is made of waterproof nylon, has a waterproof interior, includes a multitude of pockets, two side pockets for water bottles, and can be worn as a tote, crossbody, or clipped to the stroller. It also holds bookoos of stuff. 10/10.
Finally: THE STROLLER. Back in 2020, we got an Uppababy Cruz and the entire Uppababy system. The Cruz has been wonderful, but we have cycled through more travel strollers than I can count, and if I were going to do this all over again, I’d get one really good stroller that’s versatile enough for every day, but also for travel. That would be the DFY.R1 stroller.
I’m obsessed with this stroller not just because it’s beautiful and sturdy, but also because it's the only compact stroller I’ve seen with up to five different heights! My husband is 6’3”! Do you know how hard it is for him to walk our kids with the usual travel strollers? This beauty has all the conveniences of a non-travel stroller, like adjustable canopy with air vent, easy-recline seat, and optional cupholder, but it still folds up like a dream. It’s heavier than most travel strollers (26lbs.) but it’s easy to fold, has a handle and unique suspension technology for a smooth ride, and, to me, it’s worth having one stroller that does it all, even if it’s slightly bulkier than our past travel strollers. We always gate-check it anyway.
Other great, more lightweight options are: The Colugo Compact Stroller+, which is absolutely the easiest to pop open with one hand, weighs only 16.8 lbs., and has a taller handle height than most travel strollers (though I hate where the brake is located, in the center, because I constantly kick it by accident during walks); the Uppababy Minu, which is smaller than Cruz, but still sturdy, compatible with Uppababy car seats, and is only 16.7 lbs.; or if you’re looking for double strollers, we have been utterly obsessed with our Silver Cross Jet Double, which we travel with, but also use as our everyday double when taking both kids out and about (or just for walks in the neighborhood).
THE LIST GOES ON
We’re always discovering new, more efficient ways to parent, and these are just a few of the practices and products that I’ve reflected on these last five years – no doubt in another five years I’ll have more opinions! But whether it’s a play set or pair of pants, I have loved the comfort and convenience of these aforementioned products. And while parenthood is more about the memories than the messes we make, it sure doesn’t hurt to have a little help from the gear.
