10 Things Renowned Relationship Therapist Esther Perel Swears by When She’s Not Fixing All of Our Problems

“I've been wearing Goldish jewelry for decades. When my youngest son was born, I was walking in SoHo and singing to calm the baby. Yafit, the founder of Goldish, heard me and we started walking together. When I told her that I’d just come home from the hospital, she invited me to breakfast. That gesture meant so much—it was one of the most beautiful things someone could have done for me in that moment. My son is in his late 20s now, and I’ve been wearing her jewelry ever since. I’m hardly ever without it.”

“The workplace has undergone a profound transformation over the past few years and relationships at work are now taking center stage. What we used to call ‘soft skills’  are now ‘hard skills,’ and part of the new bottom line. Because high performance (at the individual and company level) doesn’t happen in isolation, it’s rooted in the quality of our relationships at work. And yet, it’s becoming harder to connect. We work across time zones, behind screens, in hybrid spaces where proximity is no longer a given. The rituals of the workplace have changed—and so must the ways we build relationships.

That’s why I partnered with Culture Amp, the HR platform, to create Where Should We Begin? At Work. It’s a storytelling game designed to bring people together — to help teams build trust, foster belonging, and open the door to meaningful connections. It’s playful, but purposeful. Because when we tell stories, we reveal not just what we do, but who we are. And that is the beginning of a very interesting conversation — whether you’re in a one-on-one, a team meeting, or welcoming someone new.”

“I was recently gifted this exquisite Eco Luxe Trench Coat from Fleur du Mal. I’ve been wearing pieces from the brand for a few years now, drawn not only to their beauty but to the intention behind them. What Jennifer has created is more than fashion—it’s a language of sensuality and strength. 

I have a particular weakness for good tailoring—how it holds you, frames you, shapes the way you move through the world. This coat does exactly that. I enjoyed wearing this particular jacket during my clinical conference, Sessions Live, this spring.”

“I’m Belgian, and really love my chocolates. While Hu Chocolates aren’t Belgian, the dark chocolate bars are something I reach for often when I’m craving something that’s sweet, but not too sweet. At my dinner parties, instead of a formal dessert, I’ll often serve heaps of berries with bars of chocolate for all to enjoy.”

“I’ve always been attentive to my fashion choices – it’s a fun form of self-expression. I recently had the chance to do a collaboration with Argent. The suits are both powerful and feminine. But what draws me most is the community they’re building—women supporting women, ambition without apology. I’m increasingly drawn to brands where I can sense the soul behind the seams. Knowing the story, the hands, the intention behind what I wear turns getting dressed into something more than routine. It becomes both a joyful and deliberate act.”

“Wherever I am, I am happiest if I am traveling by bike. I think it’s part of being Belgian. But in New York in particular I need something to protect my head – the skull can be as fragile as an eggshell! What I love about the Closca is that I can carry it inside my pocketbook on an ongoing basis and nobody ever knows until I hop on my CitiBike.”

“I’ve practiced yoga for decades. Going to class online doesn’t really work for me. But I have a yoga group with my friends that meets regularly. I’ve come to realise that when I’m meeting with friends - in real life or virtually - I show up because I’m accountable to my friends, sometimes more than to myself. A lot of yoga mats don’t have the right thickness or grip for me; others might fit the bill otherwise but have a major environmental impact. That’s why my favorite mat is The Manduka Eco mat. It’s thick. It’s ecofriendly. And it’s a nice piece.”

“We call it ‘la box.’ And it’s not a party until ‘la box’ comes out. A friend gifted it to me in Paris years ago. In essence, the music box is a wooden box with a hand crank that you put little SIM cards in. When you turn the crank the music plays, turning you into a musician, producer and party director all at once. It plays anything you put in it and it’s different from connecting your phone to Spotify, because the instrument is among you — everybody plays and everyone is invited to dance.”

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“Nearly two years ago my podcast, Where Should We Begin, went ‘always on.’ Which means wherever I am, I am always on too. I have other microphones in my life, it’s true, but this is the mic I travel with. It’s my go-to for my own podcast, and when I’m a guest giving an interview for someone else. The audio quality is excellent and the setup is easy. Plus, it always fits in my bag, which is a feat given I try to travel carry-on only as often as possible.”

“This last one is a ‘wishlist’ item. I travel a lot for work and to visit family in Europe. Whenever possible, I use a carry-on for all my travels, even if I'm on the road for a few weeks. But I learned (the hard way) a few years ago that my US carry-on isn't accepted by European airlines. On a recent trip a friend loaned me their small Rimowa, and I've wanted one ever since. They say it's only built for 2-3 days of travel, but I can really get a lot of mileage out of a carry-on with a good divider system and solid structure. When you travel a lot, there is nothing more satisfying than walking off your flight, baggage in hand, and going straight to your destination.”

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