Our team is dedicated to finding and telling you more about the web’s best products. If you purchase through our links, we may receive a commission. Our editorial team is independent and only endorses products we believe in.
As I wrote recently, alcohol consumption is declining. It could be due to a number of factors, not least of which is that recent research says that even a single alcoholic drink can do harm, and the only way to avoid a hangover is to avoid drinking altogether. But that’s easier said than done, particularly during the holidays. Or football season. Or most workdays. At the end of a long day and what feels like an even longer child’s bedtime, I almost always want a beer.
Sometimes it’s more about the act of drinking than the drink itself and, as non-alcoholic drink options continue to expand, it’s getting easier and more satisfying to find booze-free alternatives. Holiday parties have started and can be moments of excess. It’s nice to have choices when you’re trying to be social but sober. Likewise, many Americans participate in Dry January, abstaining from alcohol for the entire month.
I reviewed some readily available, though not completely mainstream, non-alcoholic lager- and Pilsner-style beers to see which ones are the best. Best is a relative term, of course, and because this is a taste test, it will be very subjective. However, I am looking for NA beers that not only taste good on their own, but which most closely resemble beer. Real beer. Non-non-alcoholic beer.
I’ve found that while sometimes only the real thing will do, a good non-alcoholic beer is a close enough substitute to successfully “scratch the itch” at the end of the day. I’m not drinking to get drunk anyway, so why not eliminate the deleterious effects of alcohol and its after-effects, while also getting all those healthy phenols that even Olympic athletes swear by?
Beer tasting follows a simple format: pour the beer, look at the beer, smell the beer, drink the beer. Pricing and availability vary, so I’m excluding those here. All these NA beers sampled are “less than 0.5%ABV” unless otherwise indicated as a true 0.0. Here are my reviews, followed by the overall winner(s).
We like
We don't like
Lite pours like, well, a light beer – a crackling white head puffs up and then settles quickly. Crystal clear clarity shows big, slow bubbles climbing up the glass. The color is pale straw gold. The aroma is slightly sweet, like cooked corn, with green grass freshness. The mouthfeel is very light, with the carbonation keeping it even more airy. The flavor is somewhat lemony, with the faintest whisper of a crackery malt underneath. I’d go so far as to say this is more akin to a flavored seltzer, though with a more interesting finish. It is clean and refreshing but too light, lacking any assertive hop characteristics from your favorite light beer.
Light beers are already the butt of so many jokes but serve a purpose. As the famous old slogan goes, they’re the ones to have when you’re having more than one. While this won’t fool anyone into thinking it’s a real beer, it is very refreshing and perfect for a hot day, maybe after (or during!) a hike or run.
Clarity: High
Color: Pale straw gold
Aroma: Sweet corn and green grass
Body: Very light
Flavor: Lemon, faintly grainy
Finish: Clean, seltzer-like
Perfect for: refreshment on a hot day, post-workout
We like
We don't like
Golden ales are basically light-bodied ales that are meant to compete with lagers. Like its Lite cousin, the Upside Dawn pour inflates a white topper which dissipates just as quickly. The clarity is lower – it has some haziness – but the color is a more lustrous gold. The nose is oddly vegetal.
If you’ve ever brewed beer or been to a whiskey distillery, it smells like the boiled, pre-fermented malt known as the wort. The aroma of most wort is somewhere between baked bread and wet animal feed. The mouthfeel is light, but has more body than the Lite, hitting the palate with a softer, rounder texture. The cooked corn flavor is funkier here, not sour, but bitter in an earthy way. The finish lingers, with almost no sweetness but rather a twiggy bite. This one needs some accompaniment and would probably go very well with a sandwich or burger at lunch when you want to have a beer but have to go back to work. The fat and protein of almost any meat would balance well here and help the malt emerge in a less leafy way.
Clarity: Translucent, but with some haziness
Color: Lustrous sunshine gold
Aroma: Vegetal graininess, bread dough, animal feed
Body: Light
Flavor: Cooked corn, earthy, bitter.
Finish: Woody
Perfect for: lunchtime, especially to cut a heavier meal like a burger
We like
We don't like
Pouring this German offering, there is a stark difference from the Athletics right from the start as the Bitburger has a dense white head that lingers. It is crystal-clear, as a Pilsner should be, revealing steady carbonation through a pale gold liquid. The nose is grassy with graham cracker sweetness. The mouthfeel is still more slender than a normal beer – there’s no real grab – but the pleasantly metallic bite of the standard Pilsner is there. The finish is dry and clean, though has a slightly hay-like thinness that seems inevitable. Though it lacks the body that the real version has, this is a satisfying substitute, maintaining the overall demeanor of the original even if it is not fully disguised.
Clarity: High
Color: Pale yellow gold
Aroma: Grass, Graham cracker
Body: Medium light
Flavor: Bitter green hops, metallic sharpness
Finish: Dry, clean
Perfect for: Post-workout, at the bar when you’re the DD
We like
We don't like
Another German stalwart, Weihenstephaner touts itself as “The World’s Oldest Brewery” and is known for its wheat beers and hefeweizens. As such, it is quite cloudy, and the color is not gold but rather tiger orange. The nose has hints of fruity esters, bringing out clove spice and faintly bubblegum aroma. The mouthfeel is, like most of these NA beers, quite svelte. Unlike the others though, this one does a better job at intimating the real thing. That same yeasty spice shows up with tangy orange peel flavors, but tails off at the end. The finish is crisp and refreshing, but loses a lot of the body of the original despite replicating the flavor well.
Clarity: Low
Color: Tiger orange
Aroma: Spicy, clove, banana
Body: Medium light
Flavor: Yeasty spice, orange peel
Finish: Crisp
Perfect for: Any kind of charcuterie involving meat and/or cheese
We like
We don't like
Good Time is brewed in New York, self-purported to be the best-tasting non-alcoholic beer on the market (I’m reminded of the light beer wars of the 1980s). Good Time is another pale pilsner; not as pale as the Athletic Lite nor as clear. It is somewhat darker than a normal pilsner, and the haze is unusual. The nose is lemon-forward with a marijuana skunkiness (weed and hops are close relatives). The mouthfeel is thin but with a roundness that the others lack. The flavor is not bad, but it is not like a pilsner. There is a lot of bracing lemon tartness at first, so it feels more like a shandy than a pilsner. The finish is very dry and clean, leaving a decidedly beer-like aftertaste. This one would pair perfectly with spicy food, where the sharp lemon flavors would temper some of the heat.
Clarity: Slightly hazy
Color: Goldenrod
Aroma: Lemon and marijuana
Body: Medium light
Flavor: Bright tart lemon, malt finish
Finish: Dry, clean
Perfect for: Spicy cuisine like Thai or Korean
We like
We don't like
The Notch certainly looks like a beer – it has a fluffy white head on top of a clear, pale gold liquid with fine carbonation. The nose is also the closest thing to a real pilsner with crackery malt and green grassy hops. The mouthfeel is narrow, like the others – I would call them all “thin” as they have a papery quality to them – but the flavor is spot-on. The hop bitterness is assertive and long-lasting, with a clean, dry finish. This is as close as we’ve come to a real beer.
Clarity: Very high
Color: Pale gold
Aroma: Grain, crackers, grass
Body: Medium light
Flavor: Grain, green hops
Finish: Dry, clean
Perfect for: Any time you really need to trick yourself into believing that you’re having a beer
We like
We don't like
Light beers are difficult to replicate – the flavors and aromas tend to be more delicate than, say, an IPA or stout, so there is nowhere to hide. The consensus is that some of these beers nail the flavor, but there’s just not enough of it. Often, they are too light on body, thin across the palate, and weak at the finish. That’s not to say they are bad; we have to take them for what they are, which is different from what they are trying to be.
Athletic Lite was far too light, and Upside Dawn’s flavors were too disjointed. The Weihenstephaner was a bit of a wildcard since it was ultimately a different style and while I liked it, it really made me want the real thing. Good Time was far too tart and lemony to accurately imitate a beer. Bitburger and Notch were the standouts, nailing the pilsner look, smell, and flavor even when they had their shortcomings.
If you're not fully committed to sobriety but want to drink something socially (or just love beer), most of these can tide you over. A note for absolute teetotalers: there is trace alcohol in anything labeled "less than 0.5% ABV" which is roughly the same amount found in kombucha or an overripe banana. Nonetheless, I would say all of the beers proved successful: in the process of researching and writing this article, I didn't drink any real beers. That is to say, the NA beers did the trick, allowing me to relax and enjoy an adult beverage without the downsides.
